hi everyone, sorry if i hadnt been posting much.. ive been swamped with work for promos and all. haha. but finally its over, though there's still chinese As and Oral Presentation for PW.. haha. at least im abit more relaxed now.

during this period of time afer the promos i've had a chance to think about how my life have been since i left sec sch and entered JC. haha. okay you're all probably guessed it hasnt been very good cause of my previous posts. i've been thinking about how i've handled my life this year. whether i've been meeting the expectations that i've been setting for myself. and after thinking for awhile i realised that i've not met even one of them.. okay maybe some of u might say that at least my results are still doing fine, but what do results matter when the rest is going wrong?

of course, some of u may see me outside all the time thinking im still the same person, but no, i've mellowed on the inside. however in the midst of all this crap i have learnt many a lesson. for example not to procrastinate or your 2 years in JC will be screwed.. right now, i can do nthing but just to take this year as a learning experience. i've learnt things about myself, about other people and about life. im no longer as ignorant as i was before.

i also realise ive lost my drive. i am no longer the driven person i was in BVSS. i trudge through each day, knowing that i am as insignificant as i have ever been. i hate this feeling. i am a goal oriented person if you dont know already, and yeah i havent really been 'oriented' towards my goals. and the only reason im studying hard is so that i can get out of JC soon and so that i wont screw up my future.. anyway, i've been keeping these feelings seperate from my studies and its sorta been working up till now, but who knows how long i can keep this up?

haha. maybe its kind of a screwed up way of thinking, but the only solace i can find now is that im not the only one with so many problems, i know many of my friends have been up to their neck with personal and academic problems.. maybe im abit better off cause i havent really had much academic problems up till now.

this post is to encourage all of my friends who are like me, you're in a stage of your life where everyhing is going too fast. everything whizzes around you and you are left all confused and disorientated. you know you have it in you but you just cant seem to pull yourself together. just remember this: bear with life for now. we all know that sooner or later everything will get better and we are all wishing like hell that it'll be sooner than later. but for now bear with it. do it for your family. do it for your loved ones. most importantly, do it for yourself.

here's to a better year ahead.

cheers =/